Wow.
Remember how pathetic I being earlier today?
Well, I have this sweet sweet cousin that doesn't read this little blog of mine and she is 2000 miles away. She had no idea about the pity party I was throwing myself this weekend.
She sent me a Facebook message today.
It was simple..."Hey, Kimmie! (Yes. My family calls me that. ) I have been thinking about you and wanted to make sure you were doing ok.
That was it. I. Spilled. My. Guts. Totally poured my heart out to her. Told her that I thought I was pregnant...or hoped, I think that I knew that I wasn't. Anyway, I told her how hurt I was to get the negative tests. How I am tired of being let down. So on and so on...
She wrote back and said the following...
oh girl, now I really know why I have been thinking about you!!! We have been trying for 7 years and 2 rounds of fertility and I haven't been pregnant once! We are actually getting everything together to try treatments again. It is a big deal and it's a hard pill to swallow when you find out your not, no matter if its the natural way or treatments. If you ever need to talk let me know, I understand totally. I wish you all the luck and love in the world, I know yall will be great parents. Hang in there and email, call or whatever if you need anything!
Love you!!
Love you!!
Really? Seriously, Kim? Did you really complain about not being pregnant to the ONLY member of your family that has been trying to have a baby and has been unsuccessful for SEVEN YEARS! Good job, Kim. Good. Job.
But how sweet was she?? How encouraging and understanding...
What she should have said....
Dear Little Brat,
You don't know disappointment yet. Wait 5 years and then we can talk.
But she didn't. She was there for me. I needed that.
She and I don't talk as much as we should. She said that she felt like she "had" to check on me. Heavenly Father loves us. Sometimes we need to be reminded of this. He often shows his love through the love of others.
Jenny made me feel loved. She also reminded me that things aren't that bad for me.
Say a pray for Jenny.
She totally turned my night around. I had been sulking all night long. I didn't go with my friends downtown for the Boston Pops and Fireworks...how lame am I??
Well, we live inside and old rock quarry (sounds strange but its very pretty). Anyway, there is a perfect view of the city from the top of the quarry. I thought of this and jumped in the car...after a few wrong turns I found the road that took me to the top. Just in time.
I could totally see the Fireworks and here the music. It was perfect. I sat alone. I watched, I thought, cried and smiled.
Here I was thinking I had missed all the fun...that I hadn't got to "celebrate". That I missed Fourth of July.
Well, folks. I didn't miss a thing. In fact, I am fairly certain that I had the best seat in the house.
Happy Independence Day!
4 comments:
That is amazing. Not the troubles either of you are having, but that you two were led to each other to talk.
I will say prayers for both of you. You will be a mommy...and you will be an amazing one at that!
xoxo
Oh, girl I totally hear ya. Gabi's nearly five and we'd love to add a sister or brother but all those darn tests come up negative. I told Kyle the other night that I feel like God's teasing me. I'll get every single prego symptom in the world - even morning sickness - and still nothing. You know, I think all women can relate, whether we've been trying for seven years or seven months. Most of us know how that feels. My prayers are with you. Hang in there.
I just started crying at my desk in the office. God is perfect as is His timing. I will pray for both you and your cousin.
Thank goodness for Heavenly Father.
love you.
xo
I'm sad for you and your cousin but I am glad you have each other to talk! God is good, so so good.
Hang in there love. If you need anything let me know. I love you!! <3
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