Will and I want a baby. This is not a secret but also not something we talk about to much. Well..."We" like "He and I" talk about it all the time. Just not too much with other people. Anyway, I am impatient and that is no way to be when baby making is involved. When we first started "trying" (I say like "this" because if you are doing the deed then, technically, you are trying) I got a bit crazy. You see, even though I knew that it wasn't going to be easy for us to get pregnant, I secretly hoped that a few months would do it. I have some conditions that I fear will make this a long hard road. This will be our trial. Our life together thus far has been so easy. We have the ideal story...
Boy meets Girl.
Boy and Girl date, then Boy proposes and Girl says YES!
Boy and Girl get married!
Boy and Girl get along very well and are able to peacefully
(for the most part) merge their 2 lives together.
Now Boy and Girl want some little boys and girls....
Insert Road Block Here.
Ok. I know what some of you are thinking. "Is she being serious? It took us years to have kids." or "Wow. They haven't even been married that long." maybe even "Get a life, sweetheart."
I won't be addressing any of those thoughts. One of the reasons that write this blog is to put my feelings out there. To share what I am feeling right now. Right now I am a bit frustrated. I am starting to feel kinda pathetically loserish too. You know why??
Who pees on a stick if they are 5 minutes late? Me
Who will again pee on a stick the very next day? oh that would still be Me
Who can pretty much convince themselves that they have ALL the early signs of pregnancy? Me, myself and I
Who stays up till all hours of the night googling, "I am 6 days late and HPT is negative. Could I still be pregnant?"? (head hung down in shame) Me...wow that one was hard to admit.
See. Now you are thinking that I am pretty lame too. I know that good things come to those who wait. I know that the Lord has a plan for each of us. I know that I need to learn to have more faith and patience. I know, oh I know. I am working on it. Will keeps me grounded. It is a full time job for him. Poor guy. Anyway, I'm not depressed or anything. I just kinda, sorta thought I was and I am not. I do wanna say that I love our life together. I love that it is just us and that we get to do so many things together. I love that there are no bed times, no schedules, and a life full of spontaneity. We just know that we are ready to share our love with a little one... Ok. Thanks for listening.
Love, Hugs & Kisses,
Kimberly
10 comments:
Hey Kim, Look anything you need to talk sometimes talking to otehrs help trust me. I know exactly how you feel cause I have been there. Trust me after 7 years in marriage I feel like I should had bought stock in HPTs. Yes every month I go though the whole "Could I, is this a sign, is that a sign" You probably understand that. Yes you will drive yourself crazy at times... I know I have! HAHA! Just remember to remain calm (trust me that is hard, I brake down every time another friend gets pregnant ... I get the excitied for them but sad for me)
But anyways, stay strong... you are young and still have time... Learn to enjoy the time you and Will have now together. There is time in my life I want a child so bad but I have to think would I have the money to do everything in my life that we do, go places and see places if I had a child. Yes while I would give it up in a heartbreat for a child I learn to enjoy the time we have together and the places we go. I am sorry if I am rambling on and on but I hope to say something to help cause I been and am still in your shoes. If you every need to talk just let me know! Love you!
Good luck!! Not that I believe in luck, but you get the idea. You are just too funny! Ha. I love your posts and tweets. I hope everything works out the way you want it. Keep us updated!
-Amy :)
You will get no flames from me, the want for a baby can (and has) make anyone (no.. not me... ha!) crazy. It happens. And it's worth the crazy hormonal fits of want and yearning and countless tests that cost an arm and a leg and everything. It will happen for you guys. Sending you hugs and patience :)
It's not crazy to pee on a stick mutiple times. I think I did like 4 times and had a blood test with Logan before the 5th time on a stick and 14 days later I got a positive. Some of us just don't have crazy strong hormones. I know what ya mean about wanting to do it daily. It's like even though it's neg there is still a chance until you start. I wish you the best, and know that when you guys do become parents that child will feel nothing but love, because it radiates in your home.
you can get pee sticks for a buck at dollar tree---I don't know if ya'll have those up there :) seriously though, kids will come faster then you think & then you won't remember your life before them. Josh & I waited 5 years until he graduated, and we still can't remember what we did those 5 years . . . it will come, but definitely enjoy the present. :) continue to enjoy trying! :)
Dont worry Kim. We started trying as soon as we got married and I google peeing on sticks for months. You should buys some OPK and start taking your temp when you wake up and graph it. That way you'll have some idea when you are ovulating.
Best of luck!
Even for those of us not excited to have a child right now, I think all women can be a little neurotic about getting preggers. I still pee on sticks and google symptoms in the am hours.
Anyways, I recently read a book to Gabi that brought me to tears. It was called the Red Thread and its based on a Chinese proverb that says that there is an invisible red thread coming from your heart and connecting you to all those you are destined to have in your family. As you journey through life, sometimes you'll find that the red thread is longer than others, but if you go in the right direction, you will always find those special people. If you have a library, check it out. Very sweet idea, which I actually believe in.
One day, I know you'll discover that the invisible red thread coming from your heart is tied to the little toes of a sweet and precious baby.
Keep journeying!!
Good luck sweetie! It'll happen...and when it does...it'll be time to PARTAY!!!!!!
Things I know:
-You will make a fabulous mother. Will will be a fantastic father.
-I believe most women probably do those EXACT same things.
-If anyone read that and IS thinking 'get a life' I will find them and shank them.
-I love you.
-I want to see a picture of the pee test when it shows a positive sign. No lie. I want a legit picture, so I can celebrate for you!
-You are in my thoughts and my prayers ALWAYS!
You are not crazy. I still pee on sticks when I think I am late and google "Am I pregnant?" even though I have done it twice already...of course I am googling it and freaking out because I DON'T like surprises lol.
I love you a miss you!
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